Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Better Relationships With Your Partner


I came across this article in "Women's Weekly" magazine and feels that some of its tips were quite useful. There are times when we might get too comfortable in a relationship and end up taking our partners for granted or forget the feeling of being in love. This article offers tips to help pave the way for a smoother relationship and its especially useful for those who are tired of arguing with your partner and keeping score ;>



  • Be nice to each other (Don't overlook the importance of a kind gesture. When the two of you are in the middle of a spat, force yourself to do something nice for him-you can get him a cup of coffee, hand him his glasses or even motion towards a chair for him to sit, say psychologists Michele Weiner-Davis, author of Divorce Busting. These little ice breakers have tremendous psychological impact)


                • Stop; think; write (Sometimes your argument looks ridiculous once it's on paper. Instead of blurting out what is making you angry, jot it down on a notepad. Therapists say this strategy serves another important function: It gives you time to cool off)



                • Mind your manners (We sometimes treat the people closest to us with less respect than we do the cashier at the supermarket. So try not to be sarcastic or biting. Listen with respect to what he has to say, and don't interrupt when he's talking. You'll be amazed at how many would-be fights simply fizzle out)



                • Know when to quit (Don't hound your husband to agree with your point in the heat of an argument. If he gives in, even grudgingly, back off and let him save face. Sometimes an argument goes on simply because one person refuses to let it end)



                • Think happy thoughts ( Try to remind yourself of why the two of you are together in the first place by using a specific image.For example, when you are mad with your partner, take a deep breath and make yourself recall that magic moment when the two of you first met or how caring he was when you were sick or unhappy)



                • Ask yourself: "Would i rather be right-or happy?" (Squash the urge to prove yourself right every time, even when you are the most blameless woman on the planet. "You can be right and still be miserable for the rest of your life," says Dr Weiner-Davis)

                1 comment:

                Anonymous said...

                I read this author's books and have been to her website divorcebusting.com. She has a telephone coaching program that truly saved my marriage. I like her stuff a lot.